Hospital Visit

I'm up early today as I've no doubt in my mind that I should be seeing my Nan, so after a brief phone call with my Mum (who despite her best efforts to convince me not to come to the hospital) I arrange to meet as soon as I arrive.

Phil very kindly offers to come with me and with an overnight bag packed in case we need it we head to Cardiff and arrive at about 12 noon and promptly go to the hopsital with my Mum, Sister her boyfriend.

I was totally shocked at what I saw. The last time I saw my Nan was at her 80th Birthday Party, just a couple of months ago. Then she was ok, she was walking around, talking fine, a bit confused at times but we can now attribute that to the vascualar dementia that she'd finally been diagnosed with. She was happy and laughing along with the rest of the family.

The person I saw laying in the hospital bed wasn't my Nan, it was a wreaked shadow of someone who would be utterly devestated to suffer the humiliation of having to be nursed 24 hours a day, unable to do anything for herself. She's certainly had another stroke since I'd seen her last, she couldn't speak, just groan. She couldn't focus on anything or move any part of her body - I don't even know if she could hear anything we were saying to her. My Mum is emotionally broken, there is nothing she can do, as was the case 25 years ago to the week when Granddad died in the exact same hospital.

The nurses are helpful enough and I learn that as well as all the other ailments my Nan is currently suffering from she also has septicimia and so they are trying their best to get as much fluids and antibiotics into her as possible - but they won't have the results to the identification of the initial infection she caught until Monday. I am however very fucked off of the attitude of one of the doctors, who when asked by Mum how my Nan was doing promptly told her that she would have to make an appointment to discuss the matter... what the fucking hell is wrong with these people?

We then go to have something to drink in the hospital, and by the time we get back my Nan has gone to sleep - you can tell that she's fighting sleep with all her will (for fear of the inevitable I've no doubt) but whilst she's resting we decide to leave as our presence there seems to keep her awake, when in fact what she needs is to conserve her energy to fight the infections running through her.

Eventually then we head for home, no knowing what the next hours or days will bring.

Posted by Abi on the June 25, 2005 10:06 PM

sjon at June 28, 2005 7:04 AM